Ask For and Welcome Feedback
By: Pastor Gabe Turner
A few years ago I heard the story of a sports broadcaster who was complaining to his agent and the network that he wasn’t getting more games. He had an ego, and no one was sure how to address him because of his reputation for not receiving feedback well. Finally, the sports agent shared with the sports broadcaster the reality of why he wasn’t getting more games – “People are saying the best way to watch your games are on mute.”
Every one of us has blind spots. And the nature of blind spots is that we can even have a blind spot about blind spots. It’s very easy to see things in others that need improvement, but those same things are hard to see in the mirror.
In my learning from other churches and organizations, one of the most important qualities for personal growth and organizational growth is being open to feedback. Organizationally, you’ll hear leaders talk about a high-feedback culture.
In the book Thanks for the Feedback, the authors open by speaking of the benefits of receiving feedback well:
“Receiving feedback well doesn’t mean you always have to take the feedback. Receiving it well means engaging in the conversation skillfully and making thoughtful choices about whether and how to use the information you’re learning. It’s about managing your emotional triggers so that you can take in what the other person is telling you, and being open to seeing yourself in new ways.”
– Thanks for the Feedback
In fact, the authors go on to say that research shows a direct correlation between actively seeking feedback and job satisfaction. And that’s not just positive feedback, that’s hard to hear feedback as well.
“In contrast, working or living with someone who shuts out feedback or responds with defensiveness and arguments is exhausting. We walk on eggshells and live in fear of pointless conflicts…Problems fester and the relationship stagnates.”
– Thanks for the Feedback
For many of us, we are the lid on our own leadership for this very reason.
It’s interesting to note that when Jesus sent out the 72 disciples two by two, they came back amazed at their authority and impact:
Luke 10:17-20 (NIV)
17 The seventy-two returned with joy and said, “Lord, even the demons submit to us in your name.”18 He replied, “I saw Satan fall like lightning from heaven.
19 I have given you authority to trample on snakes and scorpions and to overcome all the power of the enemy; nothing will harm you.20 However, do not rejoice that the spirits submit to you, but rejoice that your names are written in heaven.”
Jesus gave them feedback, and it had the potential to sting a little bit because the feedback was related to what they were looking to in terms of shaping their identity. They were rejoicing in their doing, but Jesus said you’re to rejoice in being.
360 reviews have been invaluable and set me on the course for growth as a leader. I was able to hear the feedback, learn from it, and implement a plan to grow. Even if you don’t have access to a 360 review, here’s a question you could ask: